Borborygmus

Bubbles Borborygmus 

is the monster in my gut.

He’s got a lot to say, 

but I’m not sure 'bout what.

He growls, grops and grumbles, 

mostly around noon.

I can’t get him to stop 

when I’m in a quiet room. 

Is he saying he is hungry? 

Is he saying he’s too full? 

Does he want a glass of water? 

Or some milk with cereal? 

Everyone is looking.

Everyone can hear.

But I guess his sounds are better

than the monster in my rear...

(Borborygmus: stomach growling)

Uvula 

There’s something stuck 

inside my mouth.

It’s at the very back.

It’s not one of my tonsils;

they’re out from strep attack.

It seems to always hang there,

not doing anything.

It will jiggle and will vibrate

when I start to sing.

I asked my doc the last I went;

she laughed and told the truth.

I thought she was just kidding 

and demanded to see proof.

Some body parts can be quite weird;

this one is one of those.

It flaps backwards when you gulp,

so food does not shoot out your nose.

(Uvula: the thing in the back of your mouth)

Flatulence

Flatulence is the type of word

that sounds a little fancy.

Is it a dressy shoe?

Or perhaps a formal dancy?

Or maybe it’s an illness,

should I call an ambulancy?

In fact, it’s just release of gas,

that might increase the chancy.

The person standing next to you

may think you pooped your pantsy!

(Flatulence: farting)

Epistaxis

MOOOOOMMMMMMMMM!

Your help I’m needing!

Come real quick!

My nose is bleeding!!!
(Epistaxis: Bloody nose)

Phalanges 

Fingers Toes, Fingers Toes

NOT for sticking up your nose!

Phalanges are meant for finer things:

Tippy toes and silver rings.

Painted nails, tickle fights.

Counting piggies to say good night.

Holding hands, music snaps.

Highest Fives or encore claps.

Whistle blows, scratch an itch.

Cross for luck or magic tricks.

Phalanges do so many things,

Same for children and for kings.

Fingers Toes, Fingers Toes

NOT for sticking up your nose!

(Phalanges: fingers and toes)

Pruritus

Don’t think about it, it’s a cinch.

If I don’t pay attention, I won’t feel the itch.

I feel just fine, it’s not even there.

That mosquito bite bump? I just don’t care!

It’s not red and swollen. It doesn’t feel hot.

I don’t even notice that it itches… A LOT!

Just living my life. Not starting to sweat.

I don’t even notice how bad it gets.

Distracting myself, that’s all it takes.

Whistle and snap, I don’t feel the ache.

I’m not giving in. 

“Don’t scratch!” Yells Ma,

I’m just gonna (Scratch! SCRATCH! Scratch! Scritch, scrat, scratch, 

sc, sc, sc, scratch! SCRATCH!)

AAAAHHHHH!!!!!

(Pruritus: The itch you need to scratch)

Rhinorrhea

My nose is running, I just can’t catch it.

My nose is running, it’s faster than me.

I blow and I blow and I blow it proud.

I wake up my dog; it honks so loud! 

It’s running again! What’s the rush?

It’s turning bright red; I blow it so much.

It’s just like a faucet; I can’t turn it off.

My throat starts to itch. Ugh, here comes the cough.

Stuff full of tissue? Now that’s an idea.

Hard to get things done, with rhinorrhea! 
(Rhinorrhea: Runny nose)

Eructate

What does eructate mean?

Hmmm, let me see…

I think it means to

BUUUUUUURRRRRRRP!

Ooh! Excuuuuuse Me!
(Eructate: Burp)